Currently, Lately.

rsz_screen_shot_2015-07-17_at_51204_am

Once upon a long time ago I wrote a series of If we had coffee… posts.

Led to the idea by Journey of a Dreamer (it seems she’s lost credit for the concept?), it felt a fun way to share stories about my life.

For a little while.

I mused about dogs in carts and being an Orange Rhino and a child who was feeling not-ten-but-not-four.

And then it seemed over.

For me.

(I’m a misfit that way and it’s NOT a good thing.)

I’d forgotten about Coffee Talk until I spied Christine’s recent Currently post.

Not only did I devour the beautifully crafted peek behind the scenes of her life, Christine’s musings sparked me to *want* to respond with a Currently of my own.

A longing to write feeling I’d not had in a little while.

rsz_1blog

I share my Currently, Lately in hopes you’ll respond with your own.

In hopes you’ll share what’s happening when the laptop is off and you’re alone with your thoughts.

In hopes we can connect.

Currently, I’m working my ass off on my marriage.

Antigua, Guatemala

 Where did these people go??

It’s funny (a mix of odd & haha) how, when we first marry, we never ever think there will be challenging days ahead.

I mean, we may think we think–but we really have no idea. And, if you’re anything like I am, you may not give it voice but you kinda believe it only happens to other people.

22 years together. 18 married. 9.5 of those with a child. 2 big moves in 2 years.  Shit gets challenging.

We’ve bumped right up against that moment of I’m done. and have jointly decided to give it a final try.

If this works—I believe all things are IF’s until they’re finished–I’m considering a small semicolon tattoo.

While not entirely the intent of the project, as a couple we’ve definitely stopped, paused and are uncertain if we will continue.

If we choose to end with a “;” and not a “.” you’ll know by the ink I wear.

Currently, I’m striving to have more tea parties.

goldendoodle

post-tea party selfie. doodle was not invited.

I’m pretty good about being present and spending time with the Child.

We have YES! Days, we have special routines, we do things together.

I’ve realized, however, I tend to present our options in true Love & Logic parenting fashion.

I offer two choices where I’m OK with them both (do you want to go to the creek or make shrinky dinks?) and let her choose.

Last week, when she was home with me for “MomCamp” was different.

For the most part (with MomParameters resembling bumpers in bowling) she picked the specifics of what we did.

The result was we spent 90% of our week in the pool and close to 100% of that underwater having tea parties.

We sat on the bottom of the pool, eyes wide open, pretended to drink tea—all while furiously paddling our free hand in effort to stay submerged.

I hadn’t tea partied since I was her age and it made me laugh. Hard.

A deep belly laugh I wasn’t sure we adults still possessed and one which surprised her as well.

I can’t believe it!! she said the first and each successive time. Your laugh!!

She was right.

And I couldn’t believe it either.

I’m currently on a mission to find all “tea parties” in my life.  To discover and remember all the things I used to do which made me laugh from that deep place I wasn’t sure, at 46, still existed.

Currently, I’m searching for a hobby.

rsz_screen_shot_2014-10-17_at_51850_am

I loved Stand Up Paddle!

I used to judge people who’d say: I’m too busy. Who has time for a hobby?

The thing is, even though I’ve banished the B-word, I’ve realized I still have absolutely no hobbies.

I watch movies.  I devour books. I move (I’m thinking fitness not relocate although I guess that could be my hobby?).

Those things, at least for me, are solitary (perhaps I need a Crappy Book Club!) and, unless it’s a new release, can all be done from home.

Home-bound is not a “plus” for me and my recent tendency toward the lonely.

Currently, I’m trying to find a hobby.  A passion.

I’m choosing to make the exploration and the maintaining a priority & have added to my schedule precisely as I would an important meeting.

Yoga. Stand Up Paddle. Writing group. Walking club. Resurrecting my walking book club.  Something.

I’m searching for my answers to The Invitation.

Currently, I’m loving the spontaneity of Periscope.  

rsz_fullsizerender8

OK, so I’ve ‘scoped only 4 times…but I love.

I love video (Don’t ask why my YouTube channel is named Chickenbus. That’s a story for a different day.).

I adore off the cuff and improvisation.

2015 is about connection for me and Periscope offers this vertically and horizontally.

In the era of exquisitely edited & perfectly presented—Periscope provides us opportunity to be raw & authentic.

Recently I received the compliment You were transparent before transparency was cool (made my day).

I said thank you and shared it’s a blessing and a curse.  I know no other way.

Currently, with Periscope, it’s feeling like the former.

And that’s my Currently, Lately: working on the marriage, maintaining my transparency and seeking laughter & passion.

Now you:

  • If we jettisoned the java & sat together: what would you share about your Currently, Lately?

 

Thanks to Christine for always inspiring me to write and for leading me to Tricia and Tamara and their Currently posts.

 

The post Currently, Lately. appeared first on Carla Birnberg.

This entry was published on July 23, 2015 at 9:59 am and is filed under Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

Leave a comment